Yesterday, I opened the cubicle in which all our mail usually lay. Inside the dark hole perched a tiny grey package. It was addressed to me, and even included my phone number. There was no exact return address. It only mentioned Shen Zhen China and there were some Chinese words I couldn’t read. I was elated, thinking that one of the packages I had ordered off Ebay had finally arrived.

I ripped open the envelope to find a mysterious object wrapped in white foam. It was steel tubular object attached to a keychain. A knob could screw off and revealed a metal rod with what looked like a screw and a tiny bit of cloth at the end. I took a whiff of the inside of the tube and it smelt of gasoline. I was very confused. This was not the camera accessory, film or dog costume I had ordered. I had no idea what it was, so I took a photo of it and turned to Twitter.

A bunch of people assumed it was a tiny flask, but within minutes my question was answered. It was a flint fire starter, something people took camping and used to start fires in case of emergency. The question still remained, “Why was it sent to me?”.

Initially, I thought it may have been my 12 Days of Holiday bullshit so I took to Twitter to ask. Cards Against Humanity replied and said it would be very obvious it was from them. I guess they wouldn’t forget to include their own branding on their items. A confusing tube that could start fires was quite a quirky object so CAH was a good guess, but not the right one. Now I must wait until I get all my other orders and see which eBay seller sent me the wrong thing.

However, I could get all the right parcels and still be left with a flint lighter from a mysterious place. We’ll have to wait and find out.