Yay it’s Friday! Always remember to leave some time to yourself and not always stop your life from someone else.
Have something you wish you did on your spare time? Just go for it!
Inspiration
A First Everything
I found this adorable journal at BMV for a discount price. It has many blog idea sparking questions that have to do with first times.
There’s everything from big life decisions to really random things like the first time you cheated in school. I’m looking forward to filling out this journal and seeing what kind of blog posts come out of it!
Passing 200
Today is the 216th day in a row that I’ve been blogging. I zoomed passed 200 and didn’t even notice. I also happened to have passed the 200 vlog mark!. Both are amazing feats.
Last year, I never would have dreamed to even go one month blogging everyday. Now I don’t really see an end in site. When I started vlogging (though I’ve slowed down a little now) I was very camera shy and didn’t really like speaking to camera, now it comes a bit easier.
I recently read an article about how someone wrote a haiku every day for 100 days and she learned some very similar lessons as I have. I learned to put myself out there even if some posts are dumb and there are frequently mistakes. No longer do I have a notebook or lists full of ideas that went no where. I made them go somewhere, I hit publish, even if part of me thought some things were unfinished.
I’m really excited to continue doing this every day. I feel like there’s enough in me to find something everyday. You really do have time to do the thing you wish you did “more” of, whether it’s writing, drawing, reading etc. Start by setting a goal. To do it every day.
Words To Avoid in Confident E-mails
A few weeks ago, I started attending meetups of women in the Toronto music industry. Last night, someone mentioned an article on how women tend to sound less confident than men in e-mails because they use certain unnecessary words. While, some of those theories are somewhat debunked, or anti-feminist (because men should take women seriously no matter what), I think there’s validity in using these words less often. There are times to sound polite, and nice but when you need something done (especially professionally) here are some words to avoid:
Just
Out of all unnecessary words, “just” is a word that is truly unnecessary in most cases. It can come off as too harsh if read in the wrong tone or too passive.
Example, “I want to follow up…” sounds like it will get more of an answer than “I just want to follow up”. You either want to or you don’t. There’s no need for “just”.
There are cases where it sounds too harsh. Example “just go over there”, sounds more pissed/passive aggressive than “go over there”.
Hopefully
In a professional setting you never “hopefully” want something to be done. Sound like you’re in control and less like you are complaining. “I will finish all this paper work” not “Hopefully, I will finish all this paperwork.”
Actually/Literally/Basically
These are essentially the same thing. These don’t help you explain a situation, in fact if you repeat any or all of these words in an e-mail it can ruin the flow and sound very distracting.
Kind of/sort of
It is or it isn’t. There isn’t a middle (at least most of the time). Don’t be vague.
Sorry
Unless you legitimately need to apologize for something there’s no need to say sorry (but even then, a personal call is necessary). “Sorry for bothering you but..” No. Just cut the unnecessary apology and get to the point. You never want to give a person a reason to dislike your e-mail even before they read it.
Bonus here’s a word we should say more often: No. Learning to say no avoids other people’s priorities from taking over your own, and allows you to focus on your true priorities.
Cooking As Therapy
Lately, I’ve been so busy that all my meals were quickly thrown together with whatever the hell I had in the fridge. Sometimes they’d taste weird but I made do because I was busy and headed off somewhere else in an hour (or less). Cooking and eating became more of a stressful mandatory activity than an enjoyable one.
Finally today I had time to plan a meal and actually see it through. I pan seared pork chops, following half of the instructions of a Gordon Ramsay video and my boyfriend helped and made pan-fried eggplant with melted mozzarella in between them. It was a team effort, but it was fun and relaxing at the same time.
On days where I’m not so busy, I want to have more fun with cooking again, seek out new delicious recipes and learn different techniques. Cooking can be rather therapeutic if you let it be!
Passed Halfway
Cheers! This is my 184th blog post in a row this year. That means I’ve more than passed blogging every day for the entire year. The most incredible part is my best friend has also achieved this goal.
It hasn’t been easy. The last month and a half or so have been some of the craziest in terms of work and festivals. There were a couple of times where I became super close to forgetting (like seriously I was blogging at 11pm) but I managed to get in a post every day. Having a smartphone really helps when you are in a bind. The WordPress app for iOS isn’t perfect, but it’s sufficient enough to at least upload a photo and type some words.
Though sometimes the quality isn’t the greatest, I am super happy with all my posts. I have become less critical about publishing my work and find it a lot easier to speak my mind. I like to write down ideas (or even entire posts) as soon as they come to mind, so a lot of my writing has been happening on the go on my phone. I contemplate carrying around a notebook (and you know I love Moleskines) but having a digital notebook in my pocket is just so convenient.
The summer business stretch isn’t over yet! But I’m not quitting. Besides the busier I am, the more ideas and photos I have to blog about! It’s a win win.
Life is a continuous adventure and I love sharing it with all you here.
I Love The City
I don’t think I will ever stop being a city girl. I love living downtown Toronto. It’s literally impossible to be bored. There’s always something to do, things to eat, places to go.
There’s literally something for every niche. Music photographer get togethers, knitting clubs, video game tournaments and they could get much more specific. It’s a magical place where if you look hard enough you will find a place where you truly belong.
I always hear people complain about having nothing to do in Toronto but then they turn to New York like it’s the best place ever. I find that what you’re searching for in NY, you could find here.
Everybody chooses different places to live, but mine is Toronto. Why do you love your town?
The Currency of Weird
Recently I read Anupa Mistry’s piece in The Hairpin called All About Me. In the article she talks a lot about the privilege of beauty.
I never really considered myself beautiful. I have a flat nose, a gigantic head and always look like I am slouching, even when I think I am not.
Growing up, I watched as my adorable little sister got away with things I would never have dreamed of. Beautiful people I observed through life seemed to make more friends and had a powerful natural confidence that I always dreamed I could have.
But in the past few years or so, I noticed the value of something more than beauty. The value of weird. I thank the internet – especially twitter and blogs- for this. I discovered different types of quirky people and soon realized that people appreciated all the strange things about me. It enabled me to organically grow my social media following who occasionally converted over to real life friends. I acquired some out-there freelance gigs and a boyfriend who seems to love all the peculiarities about me.
The insecurities about my looks became a non-priority. I have been sharing more selfies and personal blog entries with the goal of highlighting everything that makes me who I am. The whole idea of selfies, blogging and social media can occasionally seem self-centered but that’s okay. Let it be.
Be confident. Be who you are. Be weird.
Never Give Up
Lately my turtle has been trying to escape. Each attempt would result in him flipping upside down, yet he never gives up because he has successfully done it once. I admire an animal’s determination and feel like I could learn more a little bit more persistence.
Sneak Yourself In
Whether you’re working or just busy, don’t forget to sneak a bit of yourself in each day. It’s totally key to happiness. Whether it’s eat your favourite food during a quick lunch, or listen to your favourite songs as you type those spreadsheets, giving yourself something you can have total control of results in a more positive attitude. For me, it’s sneaking a little bit of something into my wardrobe. I like to sneak in some fun socks underneath my formal attire.
Tiana Feng 