De-stressing

It’s a long weekend and I’m finally going to take the time to take care of myself for a bit. I feel like I’ve had a lot of mental stresses lately and I can feel myself wanting to snap at times. I also have this strange muscle tension at the back of my head/neck.

It’s busy season in every part of my life so I need some time to recharge, whether it’s cuddle with the dog, take some thoughtful walks, do absolutely nothing or more importantly: sleep.

I’ve been recording it and I haven’t been sleeping as much as I should lately. I keep staying up anxiously trying to be productive. I like to spend every conscious minute being “busy”, answering (staring) at e-mails, nodding off to books, daydreaming at empty blog post screens.

It’s stupid but I actually have to teach myself to let go, be a little lazy. Sleep. Play.

Reusable Pads

 

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It’s super weird to post about menstrual pads but I recently bought these adorable reusable ones on Amazon and thought I had to share my experience with them in case other girls were curious about saving the environment and alternatives to disposable products.

I use a diva cup and for safety I was still using a pantyliner (mostly because I’m OCD and sometimes I never know when meetings will end). Liners are still wasteful, so I looked for other options and landed on these reusable charcoal bamboo pads. 6 are around $32 and come in a variety of designs. I just told the seller to send me any random 6 designs, but you can choose from over 20 patterns. There are also different absorbency types but I only needed something light.

They are super soft and have a button-snap to create a wing-like effect. I wish there was more than one button though because sometimes it can slight/bunch a bit. However, that one little drawback is outweighed by the comfort factor. I’d much rather wear these than disposable pads. They also seem to absorb a ton even though these ones are specifically for light days and have less odour.

They are super easy to clean. I tend to rinse them in the sink at night and then throw them in the wash the next time I do laundry and they look good as new. They dry super fast so you really don’t need any more than 6.

I don’t think I could ever go back to disposable products again!

 

 

Reflecting on 3 Weeks of Activity

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It’s been 3 weeks since I purchased an Apple Watch and started watching my activity levels closely. When I first got it, I was nowhere near achieving the 270 calorie Activity Goal it had suggested me. Since then, I lowered it and have been increasing it based on suggested levels each week and have been reaching them.

It might be a small (and probably mockable) goal, but it was a lot better than before I got the watch. In an effort to be beating them each day I’ve been going on more walks, standing up more every hour, using stairs instead of escalators and doing the occasional 7 minute workout.

Earlier this year, I had a scary episode of severe heartburn (or at least that’s what I think it was) where I felt like I couldn’t breathe and might not make it home from my commute. It had happened the month before too but not to the same severity. I made a small diet change: cook whatever I want to eat and limit buying pre-packaged (eating out at fancy restaurants will never go away) and bought the watch to encourage me to be more active in a less intimidating way than a Fitbit would.

It’s been less than a month but already I feel stronger, less tired all the time and mentally clear headed. Being more active takes away some of my anxious nervous energy and I’ve never felt better. I want to keep improving each week, with small goals, maybe eventually I’ll do something cool like climb the CN tower or something.

 

Movement Goals

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One of the biggest benefits personally from the Apple Watch is the Activity app which encourages me to move more each day.

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I set a modest goal, the app suggests readjustments when you beat/fail goals. Right now it’s at around 200 calories. That doesn’t seem like much but the watch does not measure the calories you burn by just living. They take into account your body, movement and heart rate to figure out active calories for the movement app. 220 is a modest amount because on days where I’m super lazy I embarrassingly don’t make it. It’s encouraged me to do more walking and taking stairs instead of escalators.

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Another part to it is this Exercise ring. It tracks any strenuous activity (again based on heart rate I think). I don’t always exercise but I do a lot of fast walking that happens to fill this ring. On days where I feel like I have some movement to catch up on I do the 7 minute workout.

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One thing we often don’t take into account is how much time we spent sitting each day. The activity app has goals for how many hours you’ve stood at least a minute. It seems like an easy goal to make but I often get reminded at the 50 minute mark that I’ve been siting for too long.

I don’t think these small changes will shed any visible weight (not that I need to) but it’s always healthy to find ways to encourage movement and I love that I have these little goals and reminders.

I Went To The Dentist

For the past 3 years, I’ve ignored going to the dentist because I was in that limbo period between being cutoff from my Dad’s insurance and figuring out what to do with life. Even after I was hired full-time, I had no idea how to go about finding a dentist that was friendly and clean-looking in the city. That is until I was reading fellow blogger Casie Stewart’s personal blog and she happened to be writing about a relatively new place called NOWsmile that opened up in the past year on Bloor & Bathurst.

It checked off all the boxes, and most important of all it was opened on a Saturday! Clayton gave me a thorough check up and tooth cleaning while I watched Cash Cab and Much Music on the TV! Now my teeth are beautiful again and I already booked my next appointment.

Let’s Talk About Mental Health

It’s no secret here that I talk openly about mental health. Every January, I have participated in #BellLetstalk, a campaign where Bell will donate 5 cents to mental health programs with every tweet that has the hashtag. There’s a lot of people out there who are rightly critical about the corporate agenda, but as I spoke last year, one day is better than none.

I would’ve killed to feel less alone in 2009, to read the tweets of thousands of millions of people who were in similar situations. It would’ve been wonderful to read the tales of how some overcome their illnesses or how others live with them. I shared my own battle with anxiety here. There was a period of time where I thought exiting this world would be easier than staying in it.

Thankfully, I am still here and willing to share my stories so that I can save someone else’s life. That’s why this day is important. If somebody reads a tweet and it saves their life, even if it’s one person, even if it was because of a stupid corporate hashtag, it is worth it in the end.

Light Up Happiness

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I’m one of those people who when there are too many clouds outside, I feel like I’m under an emotional cloud as well. It’s been especially bad November and December this year when I’ve been working so much I don’t see the sun shine. I decided to invest in one of those weird fancy energy lamps. I settled on the Verilux Compact Happy Light which was both inexpensive and still pretty if it didn’t do anything.

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So far my experience has been positive. I feel like I have much more energy after 30 minutes sitting near the lamp. I wouldn’t recommend sitting in front of it for more than an hour as it makes you feel as if you drank like five cups of coffee (and possibly find it difficult to sleep, especially if used in the evening). Placebo or not, it’s working for me!

I’m so excited to be energized, and happy.

November Was Dark

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My November blogs posts haven’t been very good. They are a bit uninspired, with few words and mostly just pictures that I found lying about. It wasn’t that I was particularly busy (after all summer is over), but my mind has been in a dark place. November depression is a real thing.  

I’m still reluctant to talk about mental health at times, it is scary and I fear that whoever reads this will judge me but it’s important to talk about it. It’s especially meaningful for those that are dealing with the same thing to know that you’re not alone.

I don’t know what particularly about November that makes it so depressing. Summer is over, the days are shorter, the weather is colder. Leaving the house gets particularly hard, even when there are so many places to go. I feel burnt out and the more I start to thing about it, the deeper I fall.

I found that offline activites like colouring and lego have helped to take my mind off things. I’ve also been spending more social time with friends (that aren’t just attending concerts). From The Bloggess I learnt that depression lies. I just have to make my good days super awesome.  

Let’s get through November together and look forward to an awesome December!

I Love Autumn 

    
I love autumn, the temperature is perfect and nature is so beautiful! It is also time to relax after a relatively busy summer.

I have been focusing on spending more time with friends and myself. It’s time to recharge.

Owning My Okayness

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I still get anxious in social situations that involve other people. It’s taken time for me to not feel self-conscious, like the entire world is judging my every move.

 

As I grew older, I started to care less about what people thought of me and more of what I wanted to be, for myself.

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It wasn’t until I was 24 or 25 that I embraced my own quirkiness, personality and openly discussed my anxiety with friends (thank you Static Zine).

Being okay with myself includes the sometimes difficult task of ignoring negativity from people who don’t really have your best interests at heart. After all if they are so quick to react negatively, are they worth keeping around?

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The Internet (twitter) made it easier to make new friends that share similar interests, anxieties and who somehow like the transparent person they see.

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The people I choose to surround myself with are positive people. They are the ones that show up when I need them, the ones that splurge on food with me, unafraid to be silly or lend an ear.

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My best friend and I talk about literally everything including our farts and poops. We can be idiots together or push ourselves to achieve our goals.

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I can own my own Okayness because the people in my life are pretty okay too.