Squad Goals is Not Feminism


You’re probably already sick and tired of hearing about the Taylor Swift/Kim Kardashian feud. I’m not really here to talk about the specifics of the feud but as the whole thing descended down, there was one critical point that kept being made.

People called it anti-feminist for Kim to attack Taylor or for any girls to critique this whole situation. That I do find problematic.

Feminism does not mean women have to like all other women. It is the freedom to decide for ourselves who we like. Think Drake and Meek Mills’ fight. Nobody labelled it anything more than a feud.

Feminism is fighting for the same equality as men. It is not posting photos with exclusive celebrities and hashtagging it #squadgoals, who typically are the type of people who bully me in highschool. It is using your platform to speak up for those who can’t.

Feminism is not posing for photos with your beautiful girlfriends. It’s not something to be used as a personal brand. A fight for equal rights is never that easy.

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#BlackLivesMatter

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The past week, I cleansed a lot of my social media feeds. First, it started with all the people who failed to see that Black Lives Matter’s sit-in on the parade was important. They failed to hear their fears of the police, using the argument of “exclusion”.

BLM weren’t saying that LGBTQ police officers weren’t allowed to march. They merely didn’t want armed, uniformed officers promoting an institution that often makes them feel unsafe. If you back at Pride’s history, it was originally founded on protests, not the colourful corporate thing it is today.

As honoured guests at the parade, I believe that BLM’s message deserved to be heard. Are honoured guests supposed to be complacent and be token eye candy? Exclusion is not a great argument regardless because is exclusion for one day bigger than lives eliminated forever? Police officers are an entity that if individual officers aren’t deciding to question the system, the deaths than they are just as complacent in letting it happen.

If you’re reading what’s happening in the USA and still don’t get what BLM was protesting for, maybe just keep silent and educate yourself. I for one stand as an ally to my friends and POC.

In Defense of Bandwagoning

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#cometogether

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The Blue Jays are doing awesome this baseball season. They are currently in the ALCS. There’s a lot of talk and making fun of bandwagon fans. But, I don’t see that as a problem.

Why should people need to dedicate themselves to all 200+ games all season in order to be a “real fan”. It’s kind of equivalent to hipsters who say things like “I liked the band when they were playing in their garage.” It’s nice if you supported the team all along, but there’s nothing wrong with people who join in once the team is doing well.

There’s pride in the city when we’re winning. We can’t always be there 100% when they lose, I mean that’s why we end up with mediocre teams like the Leafs (just kidding). Being there when the team is doing well shows the city (as well as the people who own the team, Rogers) of the value of keeping all the current players on contract and continuously on making it better. It keeps the team putting their best effort forward to keep the respect of their fans.

Taking a Breather

Photo by Kate Killet
Photo by Kate Killet

I had a hectic weekend of photographing a music festival. Look out for a post on the Food Trucks there soon! Tonight I decided to take a break from photo editing/writing and have a board game night with friends. With all the hectic things coming up, it’s nice to do something different to clear my head!

You Are The Star of Your Own Life

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Love you @richaucoin ❤️

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Lately, I’ve enjoyed reading a lot of autobiographical books/memoirs from female writers like Lena Dunham, Tina Fey, Amy Poehler, Jenny Lawson, Julie Klausner and my reaction to all of them are always “man, their lives seem so interesting and inspiring.”

But when I think more about it, I’m satisfied and happy with my own life and it gets interesting too. Though it’s fun to occasionally live through the eyes of others in books (and I guess social media), it’s important to carve your own paths, interests, adventures. I’m constantly obsessed with trying new things whether it be food, music or experiences.

This blog has been an awesome way to document some of these things and I thank all my readers for making me feel like a star of my own life.

❤︎

How Do I Do It?

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The past few weeks have been a little bit crazy. I’ve hardly had more than 20 minutes to sit down in my apartment before heading out to a another event or going to work or working at an event. As summer is approaching, this isn’t really going to change much for the next three months.

My friends like to ask me “How do you do it? How do you have the energy?” There’s one simple answer:

I just do it.

If I had to question my energy levels or give up on things because I was too tired, I would literally never do anything. Thinking too much about things like that is a literal waste of energy. I would become overwhelmed with the things I need to do instead of actually doing them. 

That’s not to say that I don’t value rest. Rest is important. It’s needed. I always take a coffee break during my lunch hours, forcing myself to get up from my desk and take a 10 minute walk to Timmies. It clears my head and also allows me to soak in some sun. I also enjoy the occasional Netflix binge or a good sleep in.

However, if I have blog posts to write, places to go, photos to edit, I don’t think much about how I am supposed to do them. I just do it.

 

The Middle Seat Is The Worst

ttc

Do you ever find yourself on a packed subway train and discover that the only empty seat is the middle seat? The one between two people.

Sometimes there’s a bag on it and you have to ask someone if you could interrupt their comfortably seated belongings. Other times there is a guy manspreading (spreading his legs and taking up two seats). They can be too squishy, especially when I am carrying my worldly belongings on my back. I try my best not to touch anyone as if everyone is made of lava.

A lot of times the middle seat exists because strangers don’t want to sit beside each other. However, I frequently discover after sitting down that the two people on both ends do know each other and I become the awkward fulcrum to a very weird seesaw. I listen to two people share their lives in great detail, without a care in the world that there is a person awkwardly between them.

Now when I see that empty middle seat, I would rather stand and watch other people experience it for themselves.

Why I Won’t #CHOOSETAXI

choosetaxiBefore I begin, I want to start up by informing you that I have no affiliation with Uber whatsoever. I am however enraged by the #ChooseTaxi campaign recently started by Co-Op Cabs, a taxi company.

Essentially, the campaign is fear mongering people away from UberX, Uber’s car-sharing service. The campaign is directed towards women (there are apparently going to be ads in public washrooms), telling them that it is much safer to ride licensed cabs.

I’ve become a frequent UberX rider (I’ve also ridden black cars in the past) and all of my rides have been pleasant. The drivers are always friendly, or silent if I’m not having a chatty day. As a 20-something-woman who frequently rides alone, I have never feared for my safety. Everything is tracked: the route you take, the licensed plate of the driver, the driver’s name. You can even choose not to hail certain drivers if their rating does not satisfy you. They can also choose not to accept you as a passenger if your rating (which you actually can’t view publicly) isn’t up to par.

The same can’t be said for regular cabs. We’ve left items once in them and had no idea how to trace cabs after the fact. A cab drive once threatened our safety by playing the tambourine driving. I pulled a bottle of vodka from under the passenger seat of the same driver. I’ve had cabs refuse to pick me up because I wasn’t going far enough (so I was stuck at Sound Academy) and drivers that risked friend’s safety so they could use an ATM in a very unsafe location because they do not want to take debit (when most cabs have the capabilities to).

The bottomline for regular cabs never seem to be the customer. They are always about the money first. When waiting for the bus, I am frequently honked at by cabs who think that honking at me would drive their business. The first few times were scary as fuck. It was the same kind of feeling I felt when strangers honk and whistle from their cars. It does not make a girl feel safe. Just because a cab is licensed does not mean they are safe.

I am writing this post because I want people to be informed. I want them to make choices based on their own experiences and not because propaganda tells them to sway a certain way. We only read about the few negative stories worldwide about Uber involving assaults, but you have to remember that Uber is a billion dollar worldwide brand. What we don’t realize is that there are probably a thousand times more of these incidents in regular taxis because they don’t have a big enough brand. Or their stories are never told.

I for one have made a choice and won’t #ChooseTaxi.

One Day is Better Than None

bellletstalk

Whether  the corporate aspect of it bothers you or not, #BellLetsTalk day is an important one. For readers that are not Canadian, it’s a day where Bell donates 5 cents to mental health initiatives every time someone uses the hashtag. Started in January of 2011, it has become an important day also for generating conversations about mental health.

Some criticize the movement for not extending to the other 364 days of the year. However, I still think it is important. One day of the year in reflection is greater than none. Plus, it’s the responsibility of everyone to continue breaking the stigmas on mental health, not just an organization.

I vlogged last year about my own experiences with battling mental health. I still struggle with it at times but ever since social media movements like this, I was more eager to speak up. I didn’t feel like a loser. I have friends that had their own experiences and shared them in a zine.

One day is better than none. One day is a start. Today somebody could find a story that they can relate to that can change their life. So keep your damn anti-capitalist opinions to yourself.

In Response To The Toronto Star.. My Best Friend Is Worth The Price

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Today I saw this editorial, Dog’s Surgery Not Worth The Money”, on the Toronto Star and it enraged me. Basically in a nutshell, Ken Gallinger gives a reader an answer on  whether he should put his dog down because he swallowed a ball or shell up $6000 for surgery. Oh yeah, and the dog is only four years old. The answer also goes on to say that even if you were made of money, there would be better things to use your money on like charities and starving people. As a dog owner this really bothered me. I wasn’t so much enraged with the question (maybe the dude didn’t have or know the proper means to help the dog), as I was with the answer.

Teddy injured his leg one time and we took him to the vet. Before the x-rays, they told us that there was potential he might need surgery (which was around $2000). We didn’t hesitate for a second. Thankfully the X-rays came back and it was heal-able on its own. Am I a sadist for not donating this money to charity instead? No, I just wanted to help my best friend.

Pets are as unpredictable as people at times. We both get sick and hurt but that doesn’t mean that we can value one over the other. The choice should not be between money and death. There were other alternatives to the situation such as seeking help from the Humane Society or similar organizations. Maybe even crowdfunding the 6k. I truly hope the owner of this dog makes the right decision for his young dog and ignores Gallinger.

Gallinger mentions having a cat, but I bet he’s never had a dog. He’s never had a dog welcome him every time he came back, even if it’s been five minutes. He’s never had a dog’s smile instantly lift his mood.  He’s never had a dog defend him in an argument. He’s never had a dog hug him to sleep after he cried or made him feel like everything’s going to be okay. He’s never had a dog love him unconditionally.